the ways I don’t tell you

Whenever you feel that I’m hiding things from you, it’s most likely that you’re correct.

It’s mostly for your benefit that I don’t say how I feel or elaborate on what I mean.

Because if I did, it’s most likely that I’d lose you.

I’ve learned from experience that it’s best to hold onto how I feel.

Because the things left unsaid are better than confronting the truth.

Maybe I’m wrong for believing that you are the same as everyone else.

But you’ve never proven to be anything else.

And if you did prove to be, the truth is I’d push you away.

Because I have a fear of losing what’s closest to me,

so instead of letting it happen

I’ll make you go.

Because I know you will do it on your own sooner than later.

Because people like you don’t stay with people like me.

And it’s my fault that I think that way,

but I’ve never met anyone who stays long enough to change my mind.

So when you feel that I’m hiding things from you,

remember that it’s better.

Because if you knew how I feel,

you’d run away.

By not telling you,

you will stay a little longer.

And then,

for once,

everything will stay as it is momentarily.

Before everything begins to change.